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” “What?” I exclaimed. “I can’t fit in that.” “But you have to cutie. The Christmas magic in the suit makes it possible for you to be my helper.” I stared at him in disbelief and thought “Christmas magic? Really?” I could not however, deny what I had just witnessed. Reluctantly, I grabbed the suit and tried to make a make a quick change with that jolly old elf watching me. I stripped quickly, trying to be as modest as possible. I dropped the elf dress to the floor, stepped in and pulled it up over my hips. Or at least I tried to. My hips were certainly wider than the petite elf but after much effort pulled the dress to a skin tight fit, only to discover another problem. I am 5’3”. The elf may have been 4 feet tall, if that much. I was going to have either my ass or my boobs exposed. I decided to at least cover my boobs. That didn’t work so well. I am a 35B, maybe a 35C. She may have been a 28A. I managed to coax the top enough to just barely cover my nipples. Doing so compressed my. I didn't know much about life in a monastery, or really about thisfaith that I nominally belonged to. While our politicians love torhapsodize about how it was our deep spirituality that got us throughthe occupation, it was Bajor's dirty little secret that the occupationhad had a polarizing effect on the population when it came to religion.Some individuals and families had become more devout, their belief thatall this must be happening for a reason helping them endure ourplanet's time of enslavement, while others it turned toward atheism. Myfamily---which is to say my mam and me---were somewhere in the middle,believing in the Prophets but trusting in them less with every atrocitywe heard about; seeing them as something that it was best to leavealone, being too strange and unknowable to be what you'd call friendly.But now for some reason these Bajoran gods that I'd never seen any goodevidence for had magically whisked me here. That is unless all thiswierdness had been someone messing.
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